THE MOVE DOWN UNDER
Australia, the epic Baz Luhrmann film, portrayed the story of an English woman leaving her home country to start a new life in a most stunning and awe-inspiring land. Luke and Kim Brill took a similar giant leap – with two children in tow.
They now reflect on their new life . . .
My husband, Luke, had spent a few years
travelling in Australia when he was younger
and caught the surfing bug! When we
were dating I knew it was Luke’s grand
plan to move back at some point. I had
been to Australia once for a couple of
weeks and never really understood what
people raved about, however I did know
that I wanted to live abroad at some point
in my life so when the opportunity arose to
move out it wasn’t a question of will we go
or won’t we, more like we will go but for
how long? Initial thoughts were two to three
years. We have been here two years now
and don’t feel ready to move back yet.
When we moved to Australia in February 2006,
Lola was three and Evan was one. We nearly moved
to Darwin in 2004 and were so disappointed when it
fell through but it was not to be and shortly after I
found out I was pregnant with Evan so the focus
moved off Australia for a while. In June 2005, Luke
sent his CV to a recruitment consultant and 6 months
later after numerous phone interviews he was offered
the job and we moved the following February.
What was it like when you first arrived?
I was petrified when we left. I was excited about it
and Luke and I definitely felt up for the challenge as
a family and as a couple. However, leaving my family,
my sister and her kids was awful. We are all so
close. Driving up to Heathrow was hellish. The
prospect of not seeing family for a year or more was
horrible but a reality that I had not really considered
until I said my goodbyes. Luckily my wonderful Mum
booked a flight before we left the UK so I knew she
would be out the following month.
I felt very close to Luke and the kids and felt that as
a family we were part of an invincible team on a big
mission but at the expense of not seeing all our
family. I still struggle to reconcile this feeling.
Did you receive advice on the move?
We looked for information before we left but there is
not a lot out there (or not that I found). Other families
have documented their journey and in some cases
even detail household bills but I didn’t find anyone
living in Sydney which meant that the information
was quite irrelevant as all states operate slightly
differently. Luke’s HR manager was fantastic and shegave us most of our information on where to live etc.
The company rented us a furnished apartment while
we waited for the contents of our house to be shipped
out. The rest we just picked up as we went along.
We have made lots of lovely friends
who all have moved here from
somewhere. I think that common thread
really unites people. Sydney truly is
a diverse and cosmopolitan place
Once we moved out, I found that people were so
friendly and helpful. I would take Lola and Evan to
the local parks and all the Mums/Dads/Grannies got
chatting and so I found out a bulk of information that
way. The local mums were so open and welcoming.
For the first week, each day I came home from the
park with a new phone number from a mum offering
to help us settle in, whether it be advice on good
parks, nursery schools etc. I think Sydney is like
London as it has a very transient population but
differs in that everyone bonds over their recent or
upcoming moves and upheavals. I left the UK
thinking we were making a huge, rare, life-changing
journey and then arrived here and realised that nearly
everyone I met had done exactly the same. Two
years on we have made lots of lovely friends who all
have moved here from somewhere. I think that
common thread really unites people. Sydney truly is
a diverse and cosmopolitan place.
How did the children adapt and how did you settle in?
The kids have been wonderful and settled in really
well. I think they were young enough for the move
not to be too traumatic. After a couple of weeks,
Lola asked where her friends were which broke our
hearts. We then launched ourselves into finding
playgroups, swimming lessons and generally setting
a routine so she could make some friends.
I felt very close to Luke and the kids
and felt that as a family we were part
of an invincible team on a big mission
but at the expense of not seeing all
our family. I still struggle to reconcile
this feeling
I found it hard to settle in and despite throwing
myself into it. It took at least 4 months before I really
felt like it was the right choice. The time difference
plays a huge part. In the day when you are feeling a
bit lonely there really is no one to call. Luke was at
work and everyone I wanted to speak to was asleep.
I wish I had joined up with Facebook earlier! I think
that would have really helped me feel connected in
the early months.
I am now studying for an MTEACH (Master of
Teaching – Primary) to become a primary school
teacher, although I am currently taking a 6 month
leave from the course. It is very expensive to study
as an international student and with month and term
long practicals around the corner it might be wise to
wait until both kids are at school and childcare is not
going to be an issue. It is at times like these I really
miss not having a family support network around
the corner.
THE LIFESTYLE
What is your lifestyle like now?
We have a fabulous lifestyle at the moment. Lola is
about to start school and Evan is really happy and
settled in a lovely nursery round the corner 2 days a
week. I have been studying for my MTEACH
distance learning and part time. Luke’s job is going
really well. We live in a lovely rental house 15 minutes
walk from the beach. Luke surfs before work (instead
of having a 2.5 hour commute to London each way).
During the week we swim in our pool, go to the
beach, visit the numerous and wonderful parks. It is
so laidback and kid friendly. The weather really helps
bring people together. I found in the UK I would visit
parks to let the kids have a quick run around and
usually not talk to anyone. Here we go for hours,
take picnics and invariably get chatting to other
mums. The fact that near most parks is a cafe
serving excellent coffee and banana bread is also a
huge bonus!
The weather really helps bring people
together and the fact that near most
parks is a cafe serving excellent coffee
and banana bread is also a huge bonus!
It does seem healthier out here. People live outdoors
and there is such drivel on TV it is not worth
watching it anyway. (My Dad kindly records and
sends out DVDs of UK telly to watch . . . and then it
gets sent round a circle of expats . . .) Lola is now a
really competent swimmer doing freestyle and
backstroke and Evan started swimming unaided
at two. If nothing else this lifestyle has taught them
that important skill.
At the weekend or weekday evenings we go to the
beach. It’s no big deal, just part of life. On those
days we have to pinch ourselves and remind
ourselves that we are on a journey and at the
moment it is really fabulous.
AS A COUPLE, THE MOVE
HAS BROUGHT US CLOSER
TOGETHER. THE BEST THING
IS REALISING THAT AS A
LITTLE FAMILY UNIT WE
CAN MOVE AND MAKE
IT WORK
On the days that Luke is not surfing I go running on
the beach and it is as busy at 6am as it is at 11am.
Everyone is up and running, doing yoga on the
beach, surfing, fishing, flying kites all before they go
to work. Everyone seems to really make the most of
the environment and what it has to offer.
What is Sydney itself like as a city to live in
and to bring up children in?
Sydney is a great city and being such a tourist
destination it gets all the good theatre, opera, and
exhibitions while still having fabulous beaches and a
laidback vibe. There are so many things to do you
can do as little or as much as you like. For example,
climb the bridge, have cocktails in one of the
revolving bars (Summit is the best – Australia
Square) or eat pretty much any type of food you
fancy (Chinese in Chinatown, modern Australian,
Thai, Brazilian). At weekends you can browse around
the local markets (Glebe, Paddington and Bondi are
the best) and pick up some clothes, jewellery, books
and paintings. Great restaurants include Icebergs on
Bondi beach, the North Bondi Italian, Toko, Bills . . .
too many to list really! It is just so easy to get around
town. We drive over the bridge and past the Opera
House. They are so beautiful, iconic and accessible.
If you have more than a day in Sydney you can visit
the Blue Mountains for great walks, the Hunter Valley
for great wines or just escape south of Sydney to the
National Park for unspoilt empty beaches like Garie
beach. At Christmas we took the sea plane from
Rose Bay up to the north shore and went out for a
very lovely lunch and then caught the seaplane
home. We were trying to work out what we could do
in the UK with the same budget and same time
allowance (5 hrs). We couldn’t think of anything to
come close!
Not so appealing are the bugs and spiders but in
two years we have only had to remove two
handsized Huntsman spiders from the house.
How easy has it been to integrate?
I was quite nervous about making friends and
assumed it would be tough. How wrong was I!
Having the kids has been the greatest ice-breaker.
Everyone is ready to stop and have a chat. Kids are
welcomed everywhere you go so with the little ones
in tow making friends has been very easy. Lola and
Evan started nursery after about 6 months of being
in Australia and through the nursery we have made
some really wonderful friends – strangely, lots of
English people!
Was it easier for Luke with regards to jobs and
settling in?
Initially, it was easier for Luke when we first arrived
as he had a purpose every day of getting up and
going to work but on the flip side I was quite
homesick so that must have been hard for him. Two
years down the line I think it is much harder for Luke
as he goes off to work knowing I am going to spend
the day at the beach and swimming in the pool while
he is at work . . . while this whole trip was Luke’s
dream it is certainly becoming mine as well now.
THE SCHOOLS
With your children starting school or nursery –
how did you find out about what to do?
Finding daycare in Sydney is ridiculously hard.
All childcare providers are massively oversubscribed.
If you call the local council they send you a list of
daycare facilities. It is then up to you to find a place.
Most places rejected me as they were full and as a
stay at home mum it would be unlikely I would get
a place as I was low priority. Others let me put Lola’s
name on a waitlist – some of which are now calling
me offering a place – one and a half years later! We
were very lucky to get Lola and Evan in daycare
together and on the same days and within 6 months.
The family we rent our house from knew a lady
opening a centre round the corner. I met them and
put Lola’s name on the waitlist before it opened and
so when it did open Lola started straight away. Once
Evan turned two he started as well.
In Sydney, daycare is split into home daycare (like a
childminder), long daycare which is open from 8am
until 6pm, (you pay one flat rate and you can drop
off and pick up when you like) or alternatively,
preschool which runs like UK preschools, where they
follow school hours and school holidays (which are
virtually impossible to get places at).
Evan’s daycare is fantastic. It is small and caters for
28 children per day. They split the groups into
caterpillars (2-3s) and butterflies (4-5s). They have a
lovely outdoor space and engage the children in
interesting play. They have recently run a unit on
astronomy to see how much the butterflies enjoy it –
considering Lola comes home explaining how stars
are formed and die, I think it is fair to say that, even
at five, children can grasp enormous concepts!
Lola starts primary school this year. We are on a
business sponsored 457 work visa so we have to
pay for schooling (regardless of state, independent
or religious). There is no free schooling option on this
visa. Lola will be going to a Catholic school called St
Brigids in Coogee, the next suburb (5 minutes by car
from home) which seemed to be a better fit for Lola
than our local Catholic school. It is a co-ed school
and so Evan will also follow there.
In Australia, there are no league tables and so finding
schools is done on local knowledge and reading
annual reports. I found this tough as I had no local
knowledge and canvassing other parents is
worthwhile to a point but views vary so much and so
drastically we just had to look around schools and
make some gut decisions.
Lola’s school is considered small with 180 students.
Each year has one class. The state primary schools
are usually well over 500 students and easily up to
1000. Each year may have 5-7 classes. The
education system is not wildly different. A huge
percentage of my readings for my teaching course
are from UK research so it would seem to be taking
a lead from UK. The focus on sport does seem to
be much higher.
What do you think are the main differences
between the UK and Oz?
I might have to quote Luke here – “I am living the life
I chose”. We feel we are getting the most we can
out of life here and that we are having a great
experience. Lola and Evan are having a lovely
relaxed outdoorsy childhood. As a couple, I think the
move has brought us closer than if we had not made
the move. However, we both have to balance this
with how much we miss our families. Luckily, our
families have either been out or are planning to come
out this year. That said, we have days when we
wonder if we are doing the wrong thing – lovely
lifestyle but with no grandparents and aunties/uncles
around. Is it fair? The only way I can get around this
is to think we are not here forever (Luke would have
to differ on that!)
“I am living the life I chose”
Without a shadow of a doubt, the hardest thing was
leaving my family and especially my nephews and
still is. The best thing has been realising that as a
little family unit we can move and make it work. We
have made some excellent friends and are definitely
more ‘why not?’ than ‘what if’ in our outlook.